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If I wait long enough...Angry, Upset
I could be cutting right now,
The weather would still be the same,
But the sky would be bleeding scarlet instead of rain
The birds would be screaming instead of singing
The sun would set and the thunder would crack
But maybe if I stay out here long enough,
This storm will fade to light...
Hating You.You will never be sorry enough
Why should I accept that?
All that's left is nightmares
Blood should be leaking from my mind
You tortured it enough so
Why do I feel numb?
Should it be this way?
Was I really that dumb?
I really do hate you
You're the horror of my past
You're the chill that haunts the room
You are the scars upon my skin
What more damage could you cause?
Maybe you don't deserve this
But actually, I know you do.
MuteThinking of those last words
Maybe I should just stop talking
Stay mute, barely whisper
This pain, like blades through my heart
This regret, like pins through my soul
This anger, just trying to escape
Trying to get out, but I won't let it
I'm mute, I say nothing
Why must I speak, I already lost you
The question, it screams at me everyday
Why couldn't you stay?
I just lay here mute, unconcsious
For no one to find me
Why Deny it ?I can never be sorry enough, and neither can you
It's not my fault I do the nasty things I do
It naturally comes to me, never ask why
There are monsters inside me I need to kill
This cannot be cured simply with endless supply of pills
What is there left to destroy? I am destroying myself
Scarring my skin in the only solution
Don't ever tell me different, for I am too far lost
Into the nothingness of today
Swirling around in the dreams of yesterday
Wandering aimlessly, only to find the blade
Dropping into the vortex, that is my mind.
Cutting deeper and deeper, I am in control.
This is my only choice, so why deny it?
I am Strong.This is killing me, why can't you see?
Everything you've done is pressing down on me
This is causing so much despair, anger, guilt, suffering
You said you'd never hurt me, you promised
But you did it anyway, for your own good
You said you still love and care for me
But then tell me, why did you have to hurt me so bad?
This is tearing me apart, breaking me into pieces
I can barely sleep, I got the first headache in weeks
I cry about it everyday
I love you. I just want you to know.
Maybe I always will.
But there are other feelings that come with this
Why did you do this!? I'm so insecure
I don't want to touch my body, I don't want to look at it
You said I wasn't ugly, then why do I feel it so much?
I question life
I question humanity
I question you...
I shouldn't feel this way
But after 2 years, it's hard not to
Why am I even writing?
Maybe it will help
Let me tell you something
The only reason I'm eating is for you
The reason I keep going
Is in hope that I
House of MirrorsThey say I spin
a web of lies,
but webs are for spiders.
They catch their flies.
No, my lies are mirrors,
each a different reflection.
They fill up my house,
my sinful collection.
Sometimes I get lost.
There's so much confusion.
Which ones are real?
Which are illusions?
I try to back track,
but the mirrors turn me around.
I cry out for help,
but the mirrors block the sound.
I give up.
Hang another mirror.
In this one I'm cruel and cold
on the exterior.
How many reflections
will I become?
Which one is real?
Where have I gone?
Never Feel AloneNever Feel Alone
For those in need; help them
So they don’t feel alone in this sometimes evil and sick world we live in
No one deserves to go live a life alone or feel like they’re by themselves,
Because as a team, any group of people can fight on through this,
And with love they will prosper through these dark and critical times
Let people have someone to lean on, something that will help them moving forward
And help them return to comfort; so someone can comfortably live their life
Give them something to strive for and look towards,
Because with a set of goals it can give one’s life meaning
It can give a lost soul some direction
And with love and determination, we can get through this phase of testing,
Tests that will forever help mold us as people; difficult times will be our defining moments
And I know those that have lost or feel hopeless may not see this,
But there’s hope, there’s life; somehow, someway we’ll find positivity throu
Lost LoveShe was precious as a flower
That had come close to a frost,
Like a bird flying in the wrong direction
That would never admit to being lost.
She was beautiful as a butterfly’s wing
Just catching at the air,
And she’d find her way into your heart
Before you even knew that she was there.
She was tantalizing as a summer breeze
And delicate as lace.
She’d go wherever the wind took her,
And would be gone without a trace.
Set FreeI don't want to be alive.
Why must everyone survive?
Death is the only escape,
When you're in this kind of shape.
Everyone wants for me to live,
But happiness they just can't give.
Loved ones that I hold dear,
Are the only reason I'm still here.
They don't know how my life is pain,
Everything they do is in vain.
They don't know what they're doing to me.
I just want to be set free.
I'll Never Love AgainI remember when I first saw you
Sitting by the ocean's bay
There was no words that could describe you
"Perfect" was all I thought to say
But you were so much more than just "perfect"
It was like you were cut right out of my dreams
A rollercoaster of emotions
My heartbeat started turning into screams
I can't believe you used to make me feel so happy
So much that everyday felt like my heart was having an attack
I can't believe a heart can beat so much
I wish that I could have those moments back
Everything was going great
But chasing dreams was really tough
It was so hard to stay on course
Who would of thought that love just wasn't enough
And I've been trying to move on
Ever since I lost you
But the problem is that I love you still
I've got no hope..
Because I always will
So I don't think
That I'll ever love again
I'd just get hurt
And It's way too much pain
I've got nothing more to gain
there's no other girl
Who'll make me feel the same
Who can make me shiver
With the way she says my nam
Suicidal LullabyDon't cry now baby,
you're almost dead.
The tears are flowing
from what they've said.
Rivulets of red
from wrists you've slit.
You had tried so hard,
but couldn't quit.
You're all alone now;
your friends have gone.
Your heartbeat's slowing;
you won't see dawn.
Your life fades away
with ev'ry breath.
You are too far gone
to escape death.
Wipe away your tears,
and be at peace.
You're so close to
New DayWake up to a new day.
My depression has faded away.
My life seems brand new.
Don't know what first to do.
I can't believe how I feel.
I didn't know how quick I'd heal.
Take a look around me.
Decide how everything should be.
You have the power to do,
Anything that you want to.
Sound Without NoiseNot knowing how
we should begin,
we stand here now
to try again.
for purest cause
as we’re observing
effects of laws
and never taking
a moment’s pause
to stop designing
new sets of flaws…
For noble goals
and simple joys,
the church bell tolls
sound without noise.
As salvation passes
over our heads,
our time relapses
to our deathbeds
and social classes
fall into reds
of blood, ink cases,
For wasted days
and shattered poise,
the night life plays
sound without noise.
Where reason fails
to bring us peace,
the infinite wills
the noise to cease
and the ancient hills
of Rome and Greece
bore witness to ills
yet to decease…
For as I lend
a quiet voice
sound without noise.
ShipwreckSometimes you drain me,
just by saying I’m drained.
I know I’m drained from your kisses,
but I know there’s some of me left.
I miss your green lighthouses,
lighting the sea as we kiss.
I used to feel protected
now I’m lost and I can’t see.
For you have turned off your lights,
and now I can’t find my way.
I swore it was your heart
that would always keep me safe.
I know how to swim,
but in these seas I’ll sure drown.
I never learned how to deal
with waves of arrogance this tall.
Lifeless.As blood runs black
Doors are locked
Her heart begins to crack
No more being mocked
She reaches for the pills
Fear of being caught
The silence always kills
Though she knows she was taught
Wringing the heartstrings
Her perception is altered
Bringing the hate with her
Misconception sets in
Sinking below reality
Out of consciousness
Thought pain was bottomless
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Bluefley has a gallery filled with artwork that whisks you off in to a Sci-fi daydream, and keeps you captivated for hours. Marc has been a member of our community for over a decade and has achieved nothing but success with his astounding commitment to interacting with the community, sharing a prolific amount of video tutorials and generally being an all round rockstar deviant. It is no joke that we are absolutely delighted to award the Deviousness Award for April 2014 to ... Read More